January Nelson wrote about 25 things you should do before you hit 25. I’m 23, let me check this list out…my commentary is in bold.
25 Things To Do Before You Turn 25
1. Make peace with your parents. Whether you finally recognize that they actually have your best interests in mind or you forgive them for being flawed human beings, you can’t happily enter adulthood with that familial brand of resentment. I love my mom January. This does not apply to me.
2. Kiss someone you think is out of your league; kiss models and med students and entrepreneurs with part-time lives in Dubai and don’t worry about if they’re going to call you afterward. Check, check, check. Entrepreneur who lives part-time in Dubai…this hasn’t happened…yet?
3. Minimize your passivity. Yes I’ve been told I’m passive. I prefer to use the word indifferent.
4. Work a service job to gain some understanding of how tipping works, how to keep your cool around assholes, how a few kind words can change someone’s day. Espresso Royale freshman year of college. Been there, done that-I quit after two months. My guy friends found this hilarious. Thanks Marseille for coming to see me everyday. Anyway, I kept my cool, got my friends free food/drinks, but taking out the trash at 6 a.m. wasn’t exactly my thing. I had the hardest time quitting. I think I actually thought I was good at this job. I thought, “how will this coffee shop (where I don’t know how to make coffee) survive without me!?” Illusions of grandeur.
5. Recognize freedom as a 5:30 a.m. trip to the diner with a bunch of strangers you’ve just met. Waffle House, thank you.
6. Try not to beat yourself up over having obtained a ‘useless’ Bachelor’s Degree. Debt is hell, and things didn’t pan out quite like you expected, but you did get to go to college, and having a degree isn’t the worst thing in the world to have. We will figure this mess out, I think, probably; the point is you’re not worth less just because there hasn’t been an immediate pay off for going to school. Be patient, work with what you have, and remember that a lot of us are in this together. Useless and University of Michigan do not belong in the same sentence. Next on the to-do list, January?
7. If you’re employed in any capacity, open a savings account. You never know when you might be unemployed or in desperate need of getting away for a few days. Even $10 a week is $520 more a year than you would’ve had otherwise. I did this. My savings is looking weak, but it’s a start. My friend’s grandmother always said, “out of a dollar, save a dime.”
8. Make a habit of going outside, enjoying the light, relearning your friends, forgetting the internet. I love to go outside and I am not on the internet too much at home, but only because I do not have internet at home. This drives visitors crazy. They say things like: “wait, you really don’t have internet?” ” Isn’t it cheaper to get the bundle package?” “Wait, what’s your network key? You don’t have one? WTF, Rob!”
9. Go on a 4-day, brunch-fueled bender. Done.
10. Start a relationship with your crush by telling them that you want them. Directly. Like, look them in the face and say it to them. Say, I w ant you. I want to be with you. Is using alcohol prior to said statement allowed? I’ll have to work on this. I’m not very forward when it comes to having a crush. This advice has the potential to lead you into the best love story ever or make you look like a bona-fide creep. Proceed with caution!
11. Learn to say ‘no’ — to yourself. Don’t keep wearing high heels if you hate them; don’t keep smoking if you’re disgusted by the way you smell the morning after; stop wasting entire days on your couch if you’re going to complain about missing the sun. I am pretty good at this. I’m not much of a complainer. I will tolerate heels though. They say beauty is pain.
12. Take time to revisit the places that made you who you are: the apartment you grew up in, your middle school, your hometown. These places may or may not be here forever; you definitely won’t be. I actually do this too much. My friend Sherry says I live in the past.
13. Find a hobby that makes being alone feel lovely and empowering and like something to look forward to. Painting, reading, shopping, traveling….done.
14. Think you know yourself until you meet someone better than you. Okay.
15. Forget who you are, what your priorities are, and how a person should be. Hold up January! My friends and I tried this once in Acapulco and again in Vegas- it didn’t go over too well.
16. Identify your fears and instead of letting them dictate your every move, find and talk to people who have overcome them. Don’t settle for experiencing .000002% of what the world has to offer because you’re afraid of getting on a plane. Planes don’t scare me. Spiders, knives, crocodiles, and someone hiding in my garage and/or backseat do.
17. Make a habit of cleaning up and letting go. Just because it fit at one point doesn’t mean you need to keep it forever — whether ‘it’ is your favorite pair of pants or your ex. Okay, I’ll work on this one.
18. Stop hating yourself. January, what was your childhood like!? My God.
19. Go out and watch that movie, read that book, listen to that band you already lied about watching, reading, listening to. This checklist must be for semi boring people. I do these on the regular, January. If someone hasn’t gone out to watch a movie, read that book, or listen to that band before 25…their 30’s are reallllly going to suck.
20. Take advantage of health insurance while you have it. That reminds me, I need to get my wisdom teeth out…
21. Make a habit of telling people how you feel, whether it means writing a gushing fan-girl email to someone whose work you love or telling your boss why you deserve a raise. I think I do this a lot. I love writing my friends letters and cute emails during the week. I could tell people how I feel more though. Thanks January.
22. Date someone who says, “I love you” first. I did that. I also don’t think ” I love you” is as daunting as Hollywood makes it. It’s just three words. Maybe you should change this to “date someone who shows you they love you first.” Eh, eh?
23. Leave the country under the premise of “finding yourself.” This will be unsuccessful. Places do not change people. Instead, do a lot of solo drinking, read a lot of books, have sex in dirty hostels, and come home when you start to miss it. I left the country and I did not find myself. I did, however, lose my i.d. and get bed bugs.
24. Suck it up and buy a Macbook Pro. I will have you know that I have had a MacBook Pro for 3 weeks now (thanks granny). When I went to buy my computer my mom asked if I was going to buy a Mac or an Apple so you can see that we are not too tech savvy at the Beck household (minus Kim who has taken every.single. upgrade I have had from Verizon).I don’t know how to work this computer well and when I put up pictures a question mark is there. Compatibility issues I’m guessing. Ugh. I had the same Dell Inspiron from freshman year and people were very angry at this. Carmelle, in particular, had a very hard time understanding why I did not suck it up and buy a Mac sooner. These same people are also livid that I have a blackberry. Calm down.
25. Quit that job that’s making you miserable, end the relationship that makes you act like a lunatic, lose the friend whose sole purpose in life is making you feel like you’re perpetually on the verge of vomiting. You’re young, you’re resilient, there are other jobs and relationships and friends if you’re patient and open. Quit what job? January, you did not read my post from yesterday. 20someones want to be happy!