Throwback Thursday: Temperaments and Peppermints

Whoever has that big orange bag, it won’t fit! You can either find another spot for it or I’ll have to check it. Okayyy I yelled back from 20e.When I found my seat I sat down and started to read. “You again?” It was the man I talked to earlier who asked me which was colder: a popsicle in Siberia or a glass of juice in Chicago. I missed the punch line. “Hey! Did you get that big orange bag to fit?” “Oh gosh. Yea. More embarrassing things have happened in my life I guess.” “One time my pants split when I was snowboarding.” “It happens to the best of us.”
“Well it looks like we might both get a little extra arm room today.”
As if there’d been a cue, a woman dashed down the aisle knocking everyone with her jacket along the way. She plopped down in between us and I glanced at the man quick enough to see him frown.  “Y’all I almost missed this flight. I was running as fast as I could, but I had this big coat slowing me down. The lady checking tickets even said the plane almost left without me. I told my sister the airport took a long time. She doesn’t go anywhere. She didn’t know!”
“Well you made it,” I said. “I made it! I hope they serve drinks soon. I’m so thirsty. All I want is water.” “I want some tea. My throat hurts.” “Everybody’s throats hurt. It’s freezing. They say Chicago is realllll bad.” I waited for the man to tell his joke, but he didn’t say anything.
“Mam, you need to put your purse under the seat. ” “Ohhh no. Not me! I don’t put purses on the ground.” “Mam, it has to be completely under the seat for takeoff.” “The captain can’t even see back here. What does it matter?” “Mam, you can place your bag under the seat in front of you or I’ll have to ask you to leave.”
She pretended to put her purse down low, but as soon as the flight attendant walked away she put her purse back on her lap. “I don’t put bags on the floor. And why can’t I get on Facebook?” “You have to buy wi-fi, but you can’t get on now anyway.” “Candycrush it is. I have it already. Want some peppermints?” My throat really did hurt. “Oh yes please.” She pulls out the biggest bag of peppermints I’ve ever seen in my life. “I asked my sister to get me peppermints and she came back with this. Who can eat all these peppermints?” “I’ll help you. These are the good kind. Like sweet chalk.” “Yea sure is. I never thought about that. Let me know when the drinks come. I want some water.”
I read. The lady next to me played candycrush and the man by the window was drawing action figures.
I nudged her thirty minutes later. “The lady is coming with the drinks. Want me to order you a water?” “I’ll do it. I thought I’d be sleep.” It’s the same flight attendant who told her to put her purse down. “What can I get you all? We have everything except for hot tea and coffee. Our pipes are frozen.” I order a cranapple, the man orders a coke, but the lady in between us takes a while. “I don’t know what to get now because I was going to get coffee. Now that I can’t get the coffee I don’t really know what to get.” The flight attendant says she can come back. “I guess just give me a water then.” I couldn’t help but laugh. “That lady gets on my nerves. She’s crazy if she thinks I’m putting my purse down.” “When we land you will need to, but you can always stuff it on top of mine.” “It’s the principle. The captain can’t even see us back here.” “True,” I said. “You want some more peppermints?” The man next to her looked over. I couldn’t tell if he wanted a peppermint or if maybe he wanted to retell his joke. “Sure,” I said. “I’ll have a few more.”

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