Man next to me: Try this sangria
Me: Oh no thanks I'm fine
Man: No really this fruit is the best fruit I've ever had. There's pineapples
Me: (I watch as he digs his hands down his glass) I'm fine
Man: I said pineapples!
Me: Okay I'll try a little. (I dig my finger into mans glass) Damn that is good. It reminds me of those dole fruit cups my mom used to eat
Man: This is NOT your mother's Dole fruit cup.
Girl: Okay I don't like to gossip, but tell me if you think this is weird. Getting married to someone after three months. Weird or not weird?
Me: Sounds like Khloe and Lamar. I don't think you can know someone after three months, but I'm probably jaded
Girl: But it's weird right? I mean my friend said she couldn't even remember her life before meeting him
Me: She couldn't remember her life three months ago?
Girl: Exactly! See it's weird! But do you want to see their video on Facebook?
Me: I'm good
Lady: Sorry I had to get away from my loser coworkers. They're just a bunch of stupid, young twenty year olds, but we have to do these social things. How old are you anyway?
Lady: Well I don't mean you Me: (side eye)
Me: (super excited) Have any Cinco de Mayo specials?
Bartender: (not amused) No
Bartender: It’s happy hour. That’s happy
Me: Okay gin and tonic please
Bartender:(He waits ten minutes then throws a lime in my cup) There. Happy Cinco de Mayo
Pod 39 bar
Me: Gosh I would love to bartend here
Man: I think tattoos are a requirement
Me: Guess I’m out
Man: Yea they’re looking for Dennis Rodman and you’re giving me Mary Poppins
Me: Mary Poppins?!
Man: A younger, more fun, tequila drinking Mary Poppins
Me: We’re wondering how many tattoos you have
Bartender: 22 and getting one more tomorrow at 11 o’clock
Me: Of what?
Bartender: It’s a tattoo of a locket and my ex girlfriend’s face in the locket
Me: Why would you do that?
Bartender: She’s the most beautiful human being in the world
Me: Did you tell her you’re getting it?
Bartender: No, but if I’m ever in El Paso I might see her and show her
Me: Can you believe he’s doing that?
Man: No I would never get my ex’s face on my arm. I don’t even like seeing his face in my mind. I need a drink just thinking about that
Girl 1: This is just like St. Patrick’s Day
Girl 2: No it’s not.
Girl 1: Please don’t take this away from me. It’s a Monday and I just want to think this is my St. Patrick’s Day, but remixed
Woman: Cinco de Mayo is fun. I’m glad I got out of the house
Me: Oh yea it’s one of the best days. Last year my friend and I got into a fight about it. He said it wasn’t a real holiday
Woman: That’s what you and your friends fight about? Must be nice. My fights revolve around who’s picking the kids up from school
Me: Who picked them up today?
Woman: I did which is exactly why I’m about to have another cocktail.
Me: (awkward laugh)
Woman: I’m kidding. Not about the cocktail part, but I really do love my kids.
Man: This is the coolest bar I’ve been to in a while
Me: Yea it’s awesome and I live right down the street
Man: So you’re a regular
Me: No, but I want to be
Man: Don’t we all. There’s nothing like walking in a place and nodding your head. Not that I’ve done it, but I bet there’s nothing like it
Happy Tuesday y’all and stay tuned this week to hear from some amazing mothers as we approach Mother’s Day!